Download Ebook , by Dennis M. McCullough
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, by Dennis M. McCullough
Download Ebook , by Dennis M. McCullough
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Product details
File Size: 746 KB
Print Length: 290 pages
Publisher: HarperCollins e-books; Reprint edition (October 13, 2009)
Publication Date: October 13, 2009
Sold by: HarperCollins Publishers
Language: English
ASIN: B00134XESM
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Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#446,851 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
This book is the most loving guide to caring for aging parents that I have ever read. I experienced all of the stages, though in warp speed, when my wonderful mother became ill at 82 and died just three months later. Years in healthcare and helping others in this process did not prepare me for my own loss and my mother's passing. Dr. McCullough's advice to be vigilant, compassionate, and respectful during the natural process of life nearing the end of itself was very timely. His insightful and life-affirming attention called to the compensation made by elders to difficulties encountered during the aging process was so valuable and so loving. It has made me conscious that my own first response to my mother's perfectly appropriate adaptation to her own life changes was to "rush in", instead of standing back in amazement at the natural sequence of her acceptance in her preparation for what was to come. We have so come to expect and to hope that modern medicine and endless physician appointments and re-hospitalizations will "make things right." All done out of fear and hopefulness, but the outcome, nevertheless, is the same, and we have missed opportunities for acceptance and to appreciate the qualities from the wisdom that comes with age. The lessons will help me to observe and anticipate the "stations" of late life, and to prepare and support. The author so eloquently and so lovingly shared with all of us a lifetime of careful caring for people, to include his own lovely mother, and he obviously loved doing so. This book has given me life lessons that will never leave; it should be mandatory reading for all in the healthcare field.
Found this book may have been difficult to write and it shows up in some of the awkward flow of ideas in some places. At many places though, the flow is very good. The author breaks down the various stages of degeneration of health in old age and lists tasks loving family members and other caring people can do to try and stay one step ahead of the needs. He speaks extensively of slow medicine, a style of care he encourages. The book is specific and vague at the same time, hard to describe, wished he'd been more specific in some places mostly. A good book to start your thinking, more focused for a beginner approaching the planned care of an elder as they fail in health. The tough decisions are all still there, you just get a framework within to make those decisions.
If I had an unlimited amount of cash, I would buy thousands of copies of MY MOTHER, YOUR MOTHER. Here's who I'd give them to:Every doctor, nurse, aide, medical assistant, physical and occupational therapist, specialist, psychologist, counselor, social worker, medical insurance person, Medicare and medicaid worker, pharmacist, physician's assistant....I'd give a copy to every medical student, dentist, lab tech, optometrist, and to every adult with a parent over the age of 50, with any relative or friend in frail health. I'd give it to my neices and nephews, my mailman, the funeral director over on Main Street...You get the idea.MMYM is practical and wise. Dr. McCullough returns something we mistakenly handed to modern medicine: how to care for our loved ones, and be part of their lives during their frail final years.
My daughter recommended this book, and it was very timely since my own mother is 88 and has gone through some of the experiences the author describes. This is both frightening and reassuring. Frightening because the path ahead looks difficult; reassuring because knowing that what we are going through is similar to what other people are going through is helpful. The author makes his points by telling stories from his practice as a family physician and also as the son of an aging, and eventually dying, mother. His advice is both philosophical (his advocacy of what he calls "Slow Medicine") and practical. As a physician himself he is in a good position to offer advice on how to work with the medical establishment rather than at cross purposes with it. If you have an elderly loved one, are approaching elder status yourself, or both, this compassionate book will help you navigate your own trip up the mountain.
Living in a community for persons 60 and older as well as being active in Hospice care this book provides much food for thought. The concept of slow medicine is well presented, fully explained and has many practical suggestions . Should be read before you yourself becomes in need of such loving and well planned care. The best takeaway: medical treatment is and should be vastly different for ages 50 and 80. Our bodies have most likely changed, therefore so should our medical care, more thoughtful consideration needs to be given and our families should be involved in decision making
This is a fabulous book for anyone with “late life†family members. The first few pages of the book REALLY impacted my overall thinking and attitude. Wow....The information and guidance the author offers hits very close to home (at least it did in my case)...â€dang, I blew that situationâ€, and, “crap, this is hardâ€. But when you change your mindset and commit to the process, it’ll make all the difference. I’ve given away multiple copies because people start reading and then look up at me and say, “wowâ€. Then I get a follow up after they read the book....changed my thinking, how did you find this?, everyone needs to read this book...
Just started reading it and just the first chapter is worth owning and reading.I take full care of my 93 yr old Mom. I care for her 24/7 all by myself.This book is just so right on. I know I am doing everything right!!
This is a truly excellent book. Anyone supporting parents through aging and illness will likely benefit from giving this a read. It is intimate, compassionate and offers wise counsel. It clearly reflects the author's deep experience and insight. Highly recommended.
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